Sox, Unraveled.
A few quick notes on this weekend’s sweep, which I actually managed to watch most of (fuck you, Cablevision):
- Over four games, Boston managed to put up a line of .174/.300/.250.
- Their season OPS dropped ten points.
- 5 XBHs in four games is a bad strategy if your goal is to win baseball games.
- We all overreact way too hard when pitchers aren’t totally fucking lights-out.
- Future Hall of Famer John Smoltz sucked so hard that he got DFA’d. Even worse, he’s bald.
- Future diabetes spokesperson David Ortiz is a fat cheating liar. While I don’t give a fuck about the steroids or the lying, I’m real pleased that Red Sox Nation has to shut the fuck up now.
- While he put up his team’s best performance in Thursday night’s game, Dustin Baldroia managed only a .298 OPS during the next three days.
- Pete Abraham made a funny.
- This ancient Space Moose comic tells the story of Dustin Pedroia’s childhood. Little Dusty is played, appropriately, by Bald Dwarf. Older brother Brett is portrayed by Space Moose himself.
- And finally, I want to thank Mark Teixeira for providing me with a logical explanation for his nickname, as apparently only like three of you see what I see when I look at his face.